Karizma, why so emotional?

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Lately I've been feeling every emotion. I feel way too much and I say too little because I can't find the words to describe these emotions. Throughout all of highschool I dated someone, first it was C.S and than it was h.w, and my dad always told me that it seemed like I needed to date someone to feel valid. Which I never really realized until this school year, that I wanted attention from someone romantically so I felt like a good person, like I was doing everything correct. I absolutely love the idea of love, I love everything cliche; long walks on the beach, the notebook, looking at stars, guy gets the girl, etc. However instead of trying to love someone else, I've been learning to love myself and fall in love with everything around me which is so eye opening. The world has a lot of cruel and harsh things going on but I've learned that I love all the amazing things going on too. I love the way the leaves fall when it's windy, I love the way my ukulele and piano sound. I love writing songs and making memories with my new friends. I love the way certain books make me feel. I love how music says things words can't. I love how majestic and marvelous the northern lights are. Do you ever just look in the mirror and see things you hate about yourself? For instance I really dislike my nose, and I think my eyes are too squinty when I smile. I dislike my smile because I have a little gap in my teeth, I don't like the way my hair looks when it's growing out. But I realized these things I deem as flaws, someone will love one day. Isn't it so strange to think that things others see as flaws are characteristics someone will fall in love with. Like when people with freckles try and cover them up I think, what the heck?! Freckles are literally the cutest thing ever. And brown eyes, ugh my heart. They just twinkle a certain way in the sunlight. These things all make me feel really good emotions, however sometimes they make me really overwhelmed. It's like certain moments I feel everything and nothing at once, which can be really draining. But at the end of the day I'm glad I feel so strongly about everything.
If you two feel this way where you constantly feel emotional or want to ever process feelings I'd love to listen and chat.
- just an awkward, outspoken writer

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